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Sunday, February 7, 2010

“Ghosts” In My Hallway

If you’ve read my blog in the last couple of months, then you know that I recently lost my mother and my best friend, and while I know that every day I am healing just a bit more than the day before, something really eerie and wonderful happened to me yesterday.  In my hallway hangs a picture of my mother and father that was taken in 1982 (I believe).

momanddadframed

Now, usually when someone close to me passes, they visit me in some way or another and I can either feel their presence and/or things happen around the house to let me know they are there.  Imagine my confusion when the one person I thought would surely visit me before she passed on, my mother, didn’t.  At least I didn’t think so.  When my mother was alive you only had to glance at her eyes to see her soul and her beauty, and when she passed away I looked at her face and realized as I looked into her eyes, that she wasn’t there anymore.

Yesterday I was walking down the hall, past this picture, and in my peripheral vision I caught a glimpse of something that made me double back.  It was this picture,  or rather something new in this picture.  The eyes, my mother’s eyes, the one’s she had when she was alive, were in this picture.  They didn’t move or anything, but when you looked into them it wasn’t like looking into the eyes of a flat photograph.  She was IN there.  While I am sure to many of you this may sound just plain crazy and impossible, I can tell you from my past experiences, this was as real as my sitting here typing this out.

I stood there for a moment, mesmerized, just staring at her eyes as she stared back, smiling at me, and then I could feel her, almost as though she wrapped her arms around me from behind.  I broke into tears, but not tears of sadness, rather tears of joy that she DID come back to let me know she was all right and that everything was going to be fine.

So far she remains in the picture and I can’t help but pause and feel her when I walk by, but I think she will move on as soon as she is sure that we are healing and helping each other move on.

2 comments :

Dawn said...

You know I believe you...and in such "things". My own mother says she saw her mother stand at the end of her bed as an adult once (my grandmother died when mom was 9mos old.)--never doubt a person who says they have seen someone gone. Comforting to be sure, if not a little eery. Glad to hear things are continuing to get better. I know she'll be happy to know that too.

By the way, LOVE the blogover, very you!

Virgie said...

Kim,
I just got done reading your blog about you seeing your Mother's eyes looking back at you. I do believe that because I also see my loved ones.
I read Dawn's comment and until now I never really knew if she believed me when I told her about seeing my Mother at the foot of my bed. I have also seen my paternal Grandfather. It was during a tornatic storm when Dawn was only a couple months old. the three of us were cuddled in bed together, as we had no basement to go to at the time, in case it would come through. I only saw his beautiful face for a brief moment, but it was long enough for me to know that everything would be ok. As soon as his face was gone so was the storm. He knew how terrified of storms I was. I believe that it was his way of telling me that I would be fine.
Don't ever dismiss these visits. they always mean something.
I hope that you and Bryce are doing better. I think of you a lot. I just recently had a knee replacement so do not get around much yet, but I do check out your blog from time to time. Just wanted you to know you are thought of.
Virgie

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