IF/THEN...HAP-PEE-NESS

Years ago, somewhere back in the 1980's, during my ten years residing in the silicon valley, I was a computer programmer for a company called Tymnet/Tymshare, which was later bought out by McDonnell Douglas.  The reason for this bit of back story comes from yet another observation, in my large vessel of observations filled by my ever-curious people-watching fascinations, that people do not actually realize that happiness is a choice.

The reason this programming analogy came to mind was that we used to use something called IF/THEN statements when writing a program, i.e., IF (such and such does something), THEN (something else will happen).  I discovered recently just how often these IF/THEN statements come up in peoples' lives.  For example, I was having a conversation with a customer who came into work the other day and during our conversation he said, "If the money comes in then I'm gonna be a happy man."  Later that day a female friend of mine made the statement that, "If he does the right thing, then it will make our lives together much happier."  I found it interesting that these people, hell MOST people, think that happiness depends on something happening to create it.  This is SO not true.

Once you make up your mind that you want to live your life with happiness as your main theme, because that is the first thing that needs to happen for anything that follows to work effectively, then you also have to realize you deserve it...that it is very much okay for you to be happy.  There is no guilt about it, there is no shame, no selfishness attached to it and most of all it doesn't matter what anyone else on the planet thinks about you being happy. Circumstances are just that, the leftovers from choices we have made.  Once we start making better and happier choices, you will then achieve a happy and positive way of life, which I can tell you from vast experience beats the hell out of living any other way.  

We are a species who gets to make choices and happiness is one of those choices so why not choose it?  The next time you find yourself beginning a statement with words like, "When (this) happens," or "If (something) would occur," followed by an obvious THEN statement, stop and ask yourself why it is imperative that something happen before you can allow yourself (yes, I said allow) to be happy.  Wake up in the morning, be grateful for all the good things you have in your life, and don't project worry into your day or regret.  This will eliminate anxiety and depression both.  Just live moment to moment and BE happy.  It's okay!!! The bills will take care of themselves and if you start living a happier life, your physical health will follow that example and most, if not all ailments will be eliminated.

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.

WHICH ONE ARE YOU?

If you think about how we exist, there are two realms: the realm of understanding and the realm of “what is.” There may, of course be many more than that, but for the sake of this article let's keep the scope to a minimum.


As human beings we have an innate yearning to understand things; to reason things out and to seek knowledge about everything. We cannot know for sure why this is, but we strive for it consistently throughout our lives. Most of us have no knowledge as to this plane of existence, but we all know one thing...we are here. Why? Why are we here? Well, that really is the big question now, isn't it?


I believe we float in between two planes or realms, as I like to call them, i.e. the realm of understanding and the realm of “what is.” The realm of understanding being the more conscious state where we try to figure everything out, and the realm of “what is” being a less-conscious state where everything just is. No matter what you do or how hard you try, things just are. They will be what they will be, they are what they are, and they can only ever be what they ever will be.


Believing in ourselves, believing in God and/or believing in anything at all, is what seems to set us apart from other species. I see it most evident in the animal kingdom where, for example a bee has an instinct to flit from flower to flower to gather nectar to take back to the hive for his queen. He doesn't know why he does it and he doesn't fly around thinking, “Wow, I need a better job, I'm so sick of flying from stupid flower to stupid flower all day long for this bitch of a queen who sits on her ass while I do all the work and then I die without so much as a decent life span.” No, he just does his job without a thought about it, not realizing that he just also happens to be pollinating everything as he goes about his daily routine.


Our ability to think and reason is what sets us apart from other species and is also what makes us believe we are the dominant species, but are we? We don't even know for sure which realm is geared toward our own realities. We are vibrational, as is the universe around us, therefore it depends on which realm vibrates harmoniously with each of us independently, hence the difference in how different we are from one another, and yet the same. Sound confusing? Absolutely. I believe it is meant to be so confusing and yet so simple at the same time. We over-complicate things because we can. Those of us who can exist in the realm where things just are, tend to be the type of people we refer to as “laid back,” or “easy going.” Everyone else falls into the realm of understanding where we just have to know.


I believe the best part of all of this however, is that we coexist as one unit or one species, constantly as one, and constantly at odds with one another. I am striving to vibrate more in the realm of the “what is,” and stop allowing the realm of understanding to take over my world as it is an unhealthy balance in which I exist. I believe that balance is the key to all things good and positive and healthy. When you live or vibrate too much in either realm, you are out of balance, which I have been my whole life up to this point. I now have a much better understanding of how to balance this out and because of this understanding can usurp the benefits of balance.

If you feel like you are out of balance, take stock of how you see things, how you vibrate with the world around you, and figure out how to exist more in the realm of “what is.” It is a much nicer place to live.

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.

SET LIFE TO MUSIC...

(One of my earlier works, I love creating covers)

I love to take walks, not only for the physical benefits, but for the wonderful spiritual benefits I get like the smell of the fresh air, the beauty of the trees and the water, the flowers blooming, the birds chirping, the ducks at the park chasing me when I walk by (lol...just kidding).  

Usually when I walk I plug my headphones into my phone, which doubles as my music players, and listen to my very favorite artists, depending on my mood.  I have always LOVED Basia and lately have been listening to every song she has ever written, but I digress.  The point is that whatever music makes you happy, make sure that is what you listen to when you set out for your walk as you want your mood to be light and stress free when you set out. Today I realized that, even though life is wonderful on its own, when I set it to music it is spectacular. It drowns out the traffic noise and lets you concentrate on absolutely nothing in particular.  

I like to walk against traffic because I am a people-watcher and I find it is a great way to catch people doing things they wouldn't expect anyone to notice. I also get to see their faces and their expressions. Today it seems I noticed each emotion on people passing by...one was crying and angry, one was grimacing, one was smiling, one was frowning, one had no visible emotion, one was laughing, three were talking on the phone, 7 were texting and driving and one was deep in concentration. I was also fortunate enough to catch sight of a man and wife who looked to be in their late 80's, talking and laughing as they passed me by.  At that point I realized that each car contained a different life, separate and apart from mine and yours, but equally important and real. Each person in each car is just a small drop in a sea of humanity...a small cog which aids in creating a species; each person very involved in their moment, having their time with life, so very interested in something pertinent to them at that time. 

What a pleasure it was to watch life today as set to music.  The theme songs wafting into my ears washed away any daily stress (which thankfully, isn't much anymore) and guided me toward a calm and beautiful journey back home.  

The next time you want to de-stress in the beautiful outdoors, go for a nice, long walk and set it to music. It's amazing how all of your senses will suddenly wake up and enjoy themselves.

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.

AREN'T YOU EMBARRASSED?

I must be having a week of pet peeves because everywhere I go lately I'm hearing things that make me wonder what has happened to society.  The other day I was in one of our local stores, Fred Meyers, much like WalMart but beats it by miles, and I was standing in the checkout line behind two women about my age.  I heard one of them say, "I was so embarrassed.  I mean, what are people gonna think?"  My first thought was wow, I feel so sorry for her.  I just wanted to grab her and shake her and say, "It's okay to be who you are...it doesn't matter what it looks like to other people and it especially doesn't matter what they think."  But that would have made her worse.

I know much of the time people have these feelings because of the way they were brought up, but it's time to be aware of them and get them to rise up out of your head and heart and replace them with positive and healthy thoughts and feelings.

As a child I was painfully shy.  I kept my head down most of the time and if people came to the house I clung to my mother's side.  I had funny buck teeth, wore high-water pants and was overly thin.  I was also teased unmercifully in grammar school because of these traits.  I had less than zero self-confidence and much of that followed me into my adulthood. 

I have worked diligently on changing things in my life for the better and that meant changing how I perceived things and how I see myself.  It meant taking hold of the self-confidence I deserved and falling in love with it in my own way and in my own time.  Now that I have reached an empowered and spectacular place in my life where I genuinely love who I am, I no longer care what people think, what they hear me say, what their judgments are, what my life looks like to "them" and so on.  I am here.  I am important.  I am a good person.  I am a unique person. I can love.  I make people laugh.  I love to help people.  I can create beauty in my art, in my books and in my music and I become prouder of myself every day in every way. 

No longer will I let people judgments affect me...ever. I am done.  I am done with people who won't be a friend the same way that I am a friend to me.  I am SO done with drama and I don't want it in my life anymore.  I'm done with pretenses and lies and assholes I let control my life.  I'm done with trying to be things I'm not.  I'm done with anyone who wants to use me as they will no longer be allowed to enter my life.

Be proud of who you are...let it shine through bold and bright and right out in front.  If others have a problem with it, then it's their problem...not yours. I took stock long ago and have weeded these people out of my life.  You should try it...it feels fucking wonderful!

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.

I FINISHED MY BOOK...WOO HOO

I finished my book...the sequel to The Secret of Vesta.  It is entitled, Wrath of the Secret of Vesta.  I think it turned out so great and I couldn't be more proud and excited.  Click the link to check it out:

The secret of Vesta is back and with a vengeance, to say the least. Wicker Alabaster has her work cut out for her this time. Luckily her good friend, Pixel is there to lend a hand.Their magic is in tact but it’s no match for the forces they face. Can they hold their own against a psychopathic, evil spirit? Can they match wits with a narcissistic killer? Can they restore the elements and bring order back to our world? Join Wicker and Pixel as they fight, scheme and battle the wrath of the secret of Vesta.

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.

WHAT ARE YOU SORRY ABOUT???

What are you "sorry" about?  I was thinking about the word "sorry" today because it dawned on me just how many times a day I hear that word, not to mention how many times I say it myself.  The word "sorry" means full of woe/sorrow, or sadness, and it made me wonder why we are so sorry all the time.  

For people of my generation and back, I suppose we can't really help it.  I recall growing up hearing my parents say, "tell him/her you're sorry."  Now at the time I didn't know I was sorry, I was just supposed to "say" I was sorry.  I was conditioned into an emotion that I didn't feel, which is dishonest, really.  I get that at the time that particular learned behavior was considered a "manner," as in growing up learning manners so you will be accepted in society.  It's all a part of appearances it would seem.  Was I sorry I burped?  No, it actually felt great. Was I sorry I bumped into a lady on my way out of a public doorway?  No because it was an accident. I suppose I could have used the antique phrase, "I beg your pardon," but the word "beg" really turns me off because it isn't true and I won't beg forgiveness for an accident.

I think if people really got in touch with their feelings they could admit that much of what they say they "feel" is due to being conditioned by society a.k.a our parents.  I often wonder what a different person I would be had I been allowed to discover and fully express my feelings as I was growing up.  I've always been so repressed emotionally and now that I'm finally able to explore who I am, I feel so much freer by just being honest about my feelings.  No more will I play societal games.  No more will I put up with people who do not meet my conditions for friendship.  No more will I put up with false people who have false values and play games and create so much drama in their lives.  I'm done with drama and if I ever desire it again, it will be at a play, on the stage where it belongs.

Do I sometimes feel sorry for choices I've made that have also affected others in a negative way?  Absolutely, but that sorrow is real, it's mine, it's not superficial or polite.  I'm me now, the real me.  I can go to the concert in the park with no makeup on, no bra, holes in my jeans in all the right places and my hair piled up on top of my head with a chopstick holding it there.  I'm not sorry I look like me, I'm not sorry I'm finally comfortable in my own skin and I'm definitely not sorry for being who I am meant to be.

So it all boils down to the fact that I am excited and proud to finally understand what it is to be me and I won't be "sorry" about it any longer.  My question to you now is, what are you "sorry" for?

Thank you for taking the time to stop and visit and please, if you like what you've read, leave a comment. If you have a blog or website of your own I would love to visit it. After your comment, make sure to post your link and I will stop by and leave a comment as well. Happy blogging.